ChristmasEveShoppingBe Open to Receiving During this Time of Giving

By Eliza Marie Somers

Tis the season for giving AND receiving, however, some of us just don’t know how to receive. We ask for things, but when we get them we somehow don’t believe we are worthy. We’ve been told it’s better to give than receive.

Some reasons we are reluctant to receiving is we are afraid of intimacy or even connection with people. Receiving also takes you out of “control,” and there could be a feeling of having to reciprocate. We also may have been taught that it is selfish to get gifts while others are suffering.

The urge to push back compliments and to feel uneasy when we are given gifts is not healthy. Author John Amodeo encourages people to “sacred receiving” in his book, “Dancing with Fire: A Mindful Way to Loving Relationships,” and by doing this we give a gift to the one presenting the gift or compliment.

Next time you are the recipient exam your breathing, are you relaxed or do you feel tightness in your gut? If so, take time to breathe and take in the pleasant moment.

Martha Beck writes in this article on  that if we continue to refuse receiving it “leaves us chronically empty, prone to addiction, obsession, codependency, or an eternal psychological hunger that’s never quite satisfied.”

Wow, that’s a pretty hefty assessment. If all that is true here are some ways to help you receive. Focus on the giver: When we take the focus off ourselves we are able to receive more easily. We are giving the giver the gift of receiving. And when you say, “Thank you” examine how you feel. And don’t focus on the gift, but the meaning.

When someone gives you a compliment on your outfit, instead of saying, “Oh, this old thing?” next time stop what you are doing and look the person in the eye and say, “Thank you. I love this old thing.”

Remember you are worthy of receiving!

*During this season of giving remember to stop by For Heaven’s Sake for your holiday gifts. We have two locations: 4900 W. 46th Ave., Denver 80212 (Two blocks east of Sheridan on 46th) and 1923 North Wadsworth Blvd., Lakewood, CO (Just south of 20th on the West side of Wadsworth).

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